That Time of Month

It’s that time of the month.

Yep. You know.

Everyone knows when it comes around.

Tension is in the air. People really do
Think Twice, Speak Once.

You weigh wants versus need heavily. And if need doesn’t tip the scale far enough, you keep your trap shut!

It’s time to balance the checkbook and pay the bills. Add to that monthly stress the fact that W-2’s just came in and it’s time to look at the annual tax return.

Ugh.

Want me to make your throat close off even more?

I’m drowning in student loan debt and medical bills. Drowning as in I’ve already ripped off my waterlogged clothes, been treading for years, and my energy supply is almost drained. The time has come to pay the piper.

I’ve got to make some changes, make some adjustments, make some more money, and my response to all of those, including the “more money”, is I don’t want to!

I pretty much like things the way they are.

I like our lifestyle. I know it is very modest to many, but to some it is extravagant. We drive old vehicles with lots of miles. We paid cash for them when we bought them. We don’t live in a large or nice house. Our clothes come mostly from clearance racks, but when we can’t find them there, they come from the Wal-Mart rack. Our only real “splurges” are technology, an annual vacation (which still pales in comparison to many), and we eat out a lot. There isn’t a lot we can cut back on.

I like the amount of time I have right now. Sure, we’re crazy busy running between everyone’s activities, but if I have to take on another job, or a higher up the ladder of success job, I will have even less time. I don’t want to lose anymore time right now. Especially if I have to take on a job that comes with a commute…

I like the pattern we’ve settled in to. I feel more grounded right now than I have in years. I know there are still some changes I need (want) to make personally, and I’m finally in a good spot to make them. If I have to change everything again…goodbye to everything I’ve been working towards for myself personally.

Finances drain me.

I’m actually good with a budget. I’m actually good with numbers. That’s the part that drives me mad here.

I know there’s no quick or easy fix, and I don’t like any of the long-term plans that I know will work. I need this debt gone. I need it erased. Forgiven. Deleted.

I just want to cry out to these entities, please, please, please! Can’t you do something, anything to help me?

See, I’ve had another debt that was huge, way larger than my financial debt could ever be, actually.

It was my debt of sin.

And I cried out to Jesus, and He heard my cries, and He answered them, and now because of His sacrifice on the cross and His resurrection from the grave three days later, my sin is as far as the east is from the west.

Today I can rejoice because my Savior paid a debt He did not owe, a debt I could not afford to pay, and because of that gift of mercy and forgiveness I am assured life eternal with Him and His Father in Heaven.

My eternal destination doesn’t exempt me from the consequences of my bad decisions here on this earth. I still must pay for the choices I make, both financially and morally. However, I know no matter what level of living I do on this earth, He has promised that where He has gone He is preparing a place for me.

So, I shall persevere through this budget-making process and keep my focused on the prize at the end of this journey.

The time has come to pay the piper. I will make the necessary adjustments…it will take time…a long-term commitment, but my budget will balance. Perhaps not the way I want on this earth, but it will in my eternal destination!
photo credit: the”>http://www.flickr.com/photos/doitintheroad/4848263041/”>the camera is a toy.
via photopinhttp://photopin.com”>photopin> cchttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc/2.0/”>cc>

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2 responses to this post.

  1. Are you satisfied with your present life? You sound like you are for the most part, but I'll ask anyway.

    This may come off as I'm trying to 'fix' you, but its not meant that way. Many times words and interpretations don't match up, so I'm just wondering if you are just venting to clear your head?

    Reply

  2. Absolutely, yes! I, like most of the population I'd guess, have future goals & aspirations that I'd like to do today. Unfortunately, until those student loans are paid down my dreams are grounded. That doesn't diminish the place in our journey now…even if the slow moving process taunts me occasionally. 🙂

    Thanks fir taking the tome to read & respond. I don't revognize you from my usual circles.How did you find my little space on the web?

    Blessings,

    Cat

    Reply

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